What Role Does Emotional Intimacy Play In The Reason Behind Most Breakups?
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Emotional intimacy is very big when relationships break down. So what is emotional intimacy, and why is it so important when it comes to a relationship?
What is Emotional Intimacy?
It is emotional intimacy, or the feeling that you are deeply connected, emotionally, and personally, with someone. You are able to share your feelings, thoughts and vulnerabilities with your partner and they are allowed to share them with you too. This is what makes you feel seen, heard and understood in that relationship.
In other words, it’s the foundation of a healthy relationship. Without it, it’s possible for partners to begin to feel disconnected, lonely and misunderstood, which creates problems.
Why Emotional Intimacy Matters in Relationships
Trust and Openness
When you can share your true feelings with your partner and they show theirs, then you build trust. Strong connection is something that this trust is necessary for. Without it, things can become misunderstood and one can feel left out. For example, if one partner refuses to let things out then they may start to hold things in, which will cause frustration, leading to distance.
Feeling Loved and Supported
The thing that helps you feel loved and supported is emotional intimacy. If you're going through tough time, you need someone to talk to because there's someone who understand what you're going through and is with you emotionally. In a relationship, it’s easy to feel alone, without this kind of support.
Conflict Resolution
Things have ups and downs; disagreements are normal in relationships. How you deal with these conflicts often depends on how emotionally intimate you are with your partner. What marriages suffer from troubles, then, is not incompatibility; it's when our partners aren't willing to engage with us and hear us out instead of being defensive. Our emotions, when we love someone, are stronger.
What Happens When Emotional Intimacy Is Lacking?
Without emotional intimacy relationships become relations by default on routine. Not physically separated but emotionally distant makes it so partners may still be isolated. Over time, this emotional distance can make it harder to connect, and it often leads to:
Growing Emotional Distance: It can lead to feelings that one or both partners don’t really know each other anymore. People start talking less and less, feelings remain untold.
Unmet Needs: Emotional connection by emotional intimacy helps us meet the emotional need for emotional connection. Without it, one or both of you are likely to feel unfulfilled and resentful.
Increased Conflict: When emotionality isn’t present, even relatively small concerns can seem much larger than they really are. With no strong connection, it feels harder to really understand each other and what you are asking of one another, resulting in more misunderstandings and arguments.
Talking about how you feel is something you should do. It doesn’t mean you have to share everything at once, but you have to make space for real, open conversations. Ask each other about their days, hopes and challenges. It helps connect you deeper.
Open Up About Your Feelings
Talking about how you feel is something you should do. It doesn’t mean you have to share everything at once, but you have to make space for real, open conversations. Ask each other about their days, hopes and challenges. It helps connect you deeper.
Show Empathy and Active Listening
Being intimate emotionally isn’t just about speaking, it’s also about listening. Active listening shows you care when you hear your partner’s feelings. Admit your love for them and their feelings. There are times a simple 'I know how you feel' can really go some distance.
Spend Quality Time Together
A life that’s busy can prevent us from connecting at that emotional connection level. Give yourself time to be with one another with no distractions. It can be going for a walk, deep talking, sitting together in silence... etc. Quality time helps build experiences that pull you together.
Be Vulnerable
If both partners feel safe to be vulnerable, emotional intimacy is easily allowed. Don’t be afraid to share your lowest downs and your highest highs. It builds a way more solid bond of trust and understanding when both partners open up.
Practice Appreciation
Accepting your partner’s love can create more emotional intimacy. Thank them for the little things — the things you hardly notice that they do even make dinner, listen to your problems, etc.
We need emotional intimacy to have a strong and lasting relationship. There are no relationships without it and even the most loving relationships can break up. Couples have every opportunity to build a stronger bond by doing so, both in the good and bad times.
Opening up and understanding each other is key to emotional intimacy in a relationship and if you’re dealing with that, small steps in that direction can be huge. The more you invest in emotional intimacy, the better and better your relationship is going to get.
Anonymous 
Emotional intimacy is very big when relationships break down. So what is emotional intimacy, and why is it so important when it comes to a relationship?
What is Emotional Intimacy?
It is emotional intimacy, or the feeling that you are deeply connected, emotionally, and personally, with someone. You are able to share your feelings, thoughts and vulnerabilities with your partner and they are allowed to share them with you too. This is what makes you feel seen, heard and understood in that relationship.
In other words, it’s the foundation of a healthy relationship. Without it, it’s possible for partners to begin to feel disconnected, lonely and misunderstood, which creates problems.
Why Emotional Intimacy Matters in Relationships
Trust and Openness
When you can share your true feelings with your partner and they show theirs, then you build trust. Strong connection is something that this trust is necessary for. Without it, things can become misunderstood and one can feel left out. For example, if one partner refuses to let things out then they may start to hold things in, which will cause frustration, leading to distance.
Feeling Loved and Supported
The thing that helps you feel loved and supported is emotional intimacy. If you're going through tough time, you need someone to talk to because there's someone who understand what you're going through and is with you emotionally. In a relationship, it’s easy to feel alone, without this kind of support.
Conflict Resolution
Things have ups and downs; disagreements are normal in relationships. How you deal with these conflicts often depends on how emotionally intimate you are with your partner. What marriages suffer from troubles, then, is not incompatibility; it's when our partners aren't willing to engage with us and hear us out instead of being defensive. Our emotions, when we love someone, are stronger.
What Happens When Emotional Intimacy Is Lacking?
Without emotional intimacy relationships become relations by default on routine. Not physically separated but emotionally distant makes it so partners may still be isolated. Over time, this emotional distance can make it harder to connect, and it often leads to:
Growing Emotional Distance: It can lead to feelings that one or both partners don’t really know each other anymore. People start talking less and less, feelings remain untold.
Unmet Needs: Emotional connection by emotional intimacy helps us meet the emotional need for emotional connection. Without it, one or both of you are likely to feel unfulfilled and resentful.
Increased Conflict: When emotionality isn’t present, even relatively small concerns can seem much larger than they really are. With no strong connection, it feels harder to really understand each other and what you are asking of one another, resulting in more misunderstandings and arguments.
Related: What is the biggest problem in long-distance relationships?
How to Build and Maintain Emotional Intimacy
Talking about how you feel is something you should do. It doesn’t mean you have to share everything at once, but you have to make space for real, open conversations. Ask each other about their days, hopes and challenges. It helps connect you deeper.
Open Up About Your Feelings
Talking about how you feel is something you should do. It doesn’t mean you have to share everything at once, but you have to make space for real, open conversations. Ask each other about their days, hopes and challenges. It helps connect you deeper.
Show Empathy and Active Listening
Being intimate emotionally isn’t just about speaking, it’s also about listening. Active listening shows you care when you hear your partner’s feelings. Admit your love for them and their feelings. There are times a simple 'I know how you feel' can really go some distance.
Spend Quality Time Together
A life that’s busy can prevent us from connecting at that emotional connection level. Give yourself time to be with one another with no distractions. It can be going for a walk, deep talking, sitting together in silence... etc. Quality time helps build experiences that pull you together.
Be Vulnerable
If both partners feel safe to be vulnerable, emotional intimacy is easily allowed. Don’t be afraid to share your lowest downs and your highest highs. It builds a way more solid bond of trust and understanding when both partners open up.
Practice Appreciation
Accepting your partner’s love can create more emotional intimacy. Thank them for the little things — the things you hardly notice that they do even make dinner, listen to your problems, etc.
Related: What is the symbiotic relationship between cattle and egrets?
Conclusion
We need emotional intimacy to have a strong and lasting relationship. There are no relationships without it and even the most loving relationships can break up. Couples have every opportunity to build a stronger bond by doing so, both in the good and bad times.
Opening up and understanding each other is key to emotional intimacy in a relationship and if you’re dealing with that, small steps in that direction can be huge. The more you invest in emotional intimacy, the better and better your relationship is going to get.